Lewis and Clark

Despite what you might think, Lewis and Clark are not the latest crime-busting duo to hit your television screen. Rather, they are a pair of late 18th, early 19th century explorers best known for opening up the Western United States. They did this by traversing America from St Louis to Seaside. Where's the the I hear you cry? There is no the, Seaside is a town on Oregon's Pacific Coast. It's the venue for the photo you see before you. The family obscuring the statue of Lewis and Clark had been there perming photographs for two cigarettes, before I gave up trying to get a clear shot.

It is here that Meriweather Lewis and William Clark gathered Salt for the return journey, inspiring Gandhi to help bring down the British Empire, on which the sun never set. Without these two, Russia might very well have 18 time zones, instead of 10 or Japan might stretch from St Petersburghama to Denverokyo, an Empire on which the sun never rose. My money's on the little fellas, Island nations rock (Australia -the exception that proves the rule). Instead, thanks to L & C we have Hollywood rather than decent Ballet and the Superhighways rather than efficient trains.

On the way, the intrepid duo consorted with natives, ate fatted dogs and spent their spare time canoeing.

Their memory lives on today, most notably in the twin cities of Lewiston, Idaho and Clarkston, Oregon (I wonder who they're named after) which face off against each other across the rivers Snake and Clearwater. Lewiston leads Clarkston by 30,904 to 7,337. Indeed, as I gaze out the window at the Lewiston Seaport (Obviously?!?!), which holds the distinction of being Idaho's only seaport (Oh dear God!), I wonder whether Lewis visited the Lewiston Renal Center as Clark tucked into his Pasta at 'Bread and Pasta - Immediate Seating Available'.

All in all, Lewis and Clark were obviously a couple of good blokes, without whom a large part of the planet would be quite different. Something for which we should all be thankful. I think