Man's best friend.

Before we get onto the subject of this blog. The more observant of you will have noticed Precious' new hairdo. Precious is acutely aware of the mighty Millwall R.F.C.'s impending tour to Malta. Plus , you can hardly blame her for trying to attract a new mate - it can't be much fun having the same pair of testicles flapping about your saddle all and every day long.
Which brings me to the title. As you head North up the West Coast of the US, you are constantly aware of the need to duck under the snarling fangs of a variety of different dogs hitching lifts in the back of pick-up trucks. However, and this could easily be imagination, more and more of our canine friends are allowed to ride in the front passenger seat. More and more appear to have their driver's arm around them. On one occasion, a Chocolate Labrador was positively cuddling it's driver.
This will have got you thinking about what, exactly, have dogs down to earn the soubriquet, 'Man's best friend'. Of course there's their unquestioning loyalty, their protective instinct (those bred for fighting aside) and their damp smell. Given the attractive qualities we attribute to other mammals, particularly those found in Wales or New Zealand (Can you make a U-turn? No, but I coud make her eyes water.), there has never, so far as I know, been any hint of bestiality concerning our canine friends. And yet they're our best friend. Hmmm.
Where's his sanity? you're thinking. Has he finally cracked? You're almost certainly right - the official diagnosis is a matter of days away.
However, we breed, that is, genetically modify, some dogs in order to make them pretty. Crufts, which should hand out the 'Best in Show' to a Border Collie every year, routinely lauds a fluffy thing with a ribbon in it's coat. They even have a 'Toy' category for heaven's sake. Now what's the point of a dog that is incapable of being taken for a walk without pulling your shoulder out of it's socket in order to chase a rabbit?
There's no doubting our propensity to scratch them around their ears, the canine equivalent of whispering sweet nothings. We're all acutely aware of our dogs tendency to hump anything that wears polyester slacks, when aroused. They certainly aren't showing much shame - and why should they? I, for one, am certain that dog-lovers?!? are to be found in all corners of the globe. And who would've thought of rimming without their example? And why, pray, has the phrase, 'The Dog's Bollocks', come to mean what it does?
I'm not saying, as I pedal relentlessly into Oregon, and more and more dogs are to be found in the cab of pick-up trucks rather than the back, that men are more likely to be found conducting relationships with their dogs. It is almost certainly the weather. All I'm saying is we could all do a lot worse than a Chocolate Labrador. I know I have.